Love

One of my favorite bloggers posted today about the Valentine's Day she spent at a funeral for her grandmother.  As she spoke about the love that her grandparents had for each other and the love shared by their children and extended family, I was impressed at her description of love.  She writes about "creating love" which resonated with me as I/we try to exist in a world where love is something many view as a phenomenon that is unattainable or unsustainable.  If we understood the concept that love is created, maybe we wouldn't second guess ourselves so much and spend more time appreciating how far we've come in our marital relationships.  You can read her post here (the picture of her grandparents children around the casket was precious).

"...it struck me how, before “love” can be felt and written and sung about, it must first be created.  And it struck me how, though the polished-up package of love is attractive, the methods of creating it are less so.  Creating love is hard, and slow, and often unappreciated until years later, when you look around at your one hundred and ninety-six family members and think that someone, somewhere, did something seriously right.

Creating love looks very different than falling in love.  Creating love looks like forfeiting the carefree days of youth for the careful responsibilities of adulthood.  Creating love looks like worries about money and teething and tantrums and two jobs and a worn-down house and sewing patches (again) on your four boys’ jeans because darnit if those kids don’t go through clothes faster than you can keep them on their backs.  Creating love looks like long days and long nights–many good, some bad, but all of them coming at you full force, one after the other, each demanding as much of your scrupulous energy and attention as the last.  Creating love looks heavy, and it looks tired.  But it always looks forward.  And it always looks beyond itself."